Wednesday, October 5, 2011


Pedestretarian contributor Web Crowell found this bagel sandwich on Denny and Olive at 4: 37 PM. It was lying under a bike rack outside the Bus Stop bar, wrapped in cellophane and completely uneaten. Its neon-orange price tag read “1.75.” The sandwich’s wrapping was covered in droplets of what was hopefully rainwater by the time I retrieved it at 10: 32 PM. The sidewalk around the sandwich was scattered with enough cigarette butts to make me wonder if its owner had quit smoking and eating bagels simultaneously and hurled the sandwich out of their car along with their ash tray. The Bus Stop was empty except for a bartender and one patron, who both watched as I shook the water off the bagel and put it into my bag with expressions which seemed equally likely to mean “I was going to eat that,” and “Someone’s taking the roofie bagel.” Tasting it in the privacy of my living room revealed that it was not in fact a roofie bagel, but poppy and sunflower seed, with a thin cracked rectangle of cold, slightly dry cream cheese between its sliced halves. It tasted of the sidewalk in the same way old ice cream can taste of the freezer. The following night my roommate added hummus, avocado slices and a fried egg to the sandwich, which improved it drastically. We ate the whole thing, with beet and goat cheese salad.

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